Today, I was thinking about the difference between "could have" and "should have". Have you ever thought about this? It's very subtle. The phrase "could have" implies that a choice is involved and that two or more options were available. For instance, if I said that "Last night at the restaurant, you could have had the steak." My statement implies that you had options for dinner last night. You could have had steak but instead you chose pizza.
The phrase "should have" however is quite different. It includes a moral clause indicating that a question of moral consequences or values is at stake. If I said, "Last night on the way to the restaurant, you should have driven slower." This statement implies that you were driving to fast. You should have slowed down. By it, I imply that you have a moral obligation to drive at a speed that is safe. It is probable that you put myself and others in danger because of the speed of your driving. Maybe you also drove through a construction zone or a neighborhood. Thus, you might have risked possible injury to a worker or a child.
The point is that "should have" entails a moral obligation that "could have" does not. This distinction is important when we consider people in the Scriptures who questioned God. In the book of Job, we are told that Job questioned God. He did not understand why God allowed him to lose his family, servants, property. He could not see what God might be attempting to do through such a tragedy. Yet, Scripture teaches us that "in all of this he did not sin" (Job 1:22). Thus, in principle, it also teaches us that we can question why God would allow certain things to happen or even why He chose to do specific things within our life or anothers.
This is because Job's statements were "could have" statements. Job often spoke of God's infinite power, wisdom, and strength. Thus, God "could have" done something different but instead He did not. Job simply acknowledged this fact and stated to God that he did not understand. God was capable of handling things differently but did not do so.
Another example of this occurs in John 11 in the story of the raising of Lazarus. Both Martha and Mary state that "Lord, if You had been here, my brother would not have died" (Jn 11:21, 32). Thus, they acknowledge that Jesus could have done something differently. Martha alone continues by stating that "Even now I know that whatever You ask of God, God will give you" (Jn 11:22).
In both accounts, neither sinned. Each questioned why God did not do something. Each stated or implied that He could have done something. Yet, neither sinned. I think that this is key. There is a fine line between bringing questions to God and questioning God.
When we bring our questions to God, we acknowledge that we do not understand. We state that we are frustrated, angry, heart-broken, confused. However, we acknowledge the power that He does possess and can use. In both of these accounts, God restored life. In Job, God restored a man back to a place of physical health and provided for him a new family and new possessions. In John, Jesus, God's Son, raised Lazarus from the dead and thus restored the physical life of a dead man.
Stating that God "could have" done something is not sinful. However, stating that God "should have" done something is sinful. This is because in doing so we take a stance of moral authority over God and claim to know what God "should have" done in a particular situation. We claim to be in a position of moral superiority to God and state to Him what He should do.
Therefore, questioning God is a matter of our perspective. When difficulties come, we need to ask ourselves whether or not we will remain true to God, placing our faith in His Son and in Him, or if we will choose to question Him and His motives. Stating that God "should have" done something is always sinful.
As difficulties come, bring your questions to God. Pour out your heart before Him. Let Him know that what has happened hurts and has left you confused and wounded. Then remember the examples found in Scripture of Job, Mary, and Martha. State emphatically that God is God and that He alone knows what is best in a given situation. Job's unwillingness to do this eventually brought a rebuke from God (Job 38-39). We can choose to be different.
Choose today to remember the difference between "could have" and "should have" statements. It will make a difference in your attitude and faithfulness toward your Creator. Make sure that your questions to God are not questioning God.
Joshua
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